Early this week, UPSR results came out.
I couldn’t care less because I don’t know anyone who sat for it last September. I was surprised to know that less than 5 thousands candidate managed to get straight As. But, what surprised me most was, there’re 6 subjects/papers (it was only 5 during my time). Obviously, I didn’t read much paper.
Anyways, jokes and political arguments aside.
I know how unfathomable the despair of not getting straight As is. Believe me, I do.
I was a straight As candidate. I’ve always managed to get it in every trials. However, during the real examination, I was short of 1. T’was the most difficult thing a 12 years old me had to face. I still remember vividly the day when the result was announced. My peers and I, together with our parents, were waiting in a three-classroom long indoor seminar hall. I sat at the very back of the room. Some parents were sitting behind me. Mostly, my friends’ parents and my mom.
So, one of the admin team (who is also our teacher) gave a brief speech regarding our achievements and whatnot. Then, she started to announce students who got straight As. I waited, and waited. I realized they were calling names in alphabetical order. Then, I knew something was wrong when my friend who’s name is after me in that order was called. “Did they skipped me?” or “Am I the best student who’d be called last?” or “Did I not hear them calling me?”.
I had partial realization; turned back to my mom and gave her the “No mom, I didn’t make it this time”. I started to tear up. Slowly, the quiet cry became a loud sob. I felt the world crashing on me. I couldn’t see the future and my mind was blank. As empty as a cold white isolated room. I know, it sounds dramatic for adults who’re reading it. Truth is, that’s how big of a deal UPSR means to a primary 6 students.
To make things short, I went to the examination board (yup people, how incredibly in denial I was) and submitted an appeal to recheck my results only to receive “Your grades remain” a few months after. I promised myself not to visit the school ever again. #dontjudgebecauseyouarealwaysstraightAstudents
As far as I have written, you might think that I’m on your side and will agree with everything you do. But let me help you.
Truth sucks, I know. Nevertheless, you’ll have to deal with it. Albeit being denied to enter a boarding school (I’ve always wanted it) and not being celebrated as straight A’s student, I made it through.
When I had to go to normal school who apparently was labeled as ‘underperformed school’, I told myself: I will do my very best in this school and prove that it’s me who dictates my success and not the school. I will graduate from this school with achievements that people ought I’ll be deprived of.
With that resolutions carved in my heart and mind, Alhamdullilah, I was announced the best students for the whole three years of lower secondary. Then, I was offered a place in boarding school and things went on smooth.
You see kids, life will always find a reason to knock you down. But you HAVE to fight back. There’s so much life can offer, but only to those who persevered. Now, cheer up. You can’t change the past but you can always create your future. Work for it! Things won’t come easy but you’ll find strength, insya Allah. Ask for God’s mercy.
Till then, may peace be upon you!
p/s: Congratulations for being the first ever to be tested on HOTS! Sure, this deserve a separate discussion.